Come on in, here's your key
Let me take your bag, wait till you see
The hotel, 'cause it's great
If you parked your car, we'll validate
All our guests are family

Hey, perv, hands off the chest fluff

That's the Hazbin guarantee
And did I mention it's free?

It's worth the price

Al, be nice

Full of drunks

Full of cuntsf

Full of sticky floors covered in junk

Ha, don't mind them

No one does

Or that hole

Ugh, Cherri
What?

You've made a great choice to save your soul
'Cause redemption is possible, I really, really hope
'Cause if it isn't, then my whole life's been a fuckin' joke
And my friend died for no reason and I'm never gonna cope
From watching him get fucking murdered
Right in front of me last month

What?

There's a bar

What the shit?

Have a beer

I don't drink

I just know you're gonna love it here

We can live in harmony

No, I can't make a fucking Mai Tai

That's the Hazbin guarantee

Now repeat after me
I'm checkin' in (I'm checkin' in)
I'm seekin' guidance (I'm seekin' guidance)
Come on, everybody
For my reckonin' (for my reckonin')
I'll never turn to violence (I'll never turn)
I'm checkin' in (I'm checking in)
I'm seekin' guidance

That place sucked ass

Psst, hey, you

Who? Me?

That's right, baby

Redemption got you snoring? That scene was fucking boring
Have you considered a vocation that is more rewarding?
Because I sense a drop of star potential
With a little boost, that drip could turn torrential

Come on down to Vee Tower where we have talent flower

No tellin' how hot you could get
Once you're backed by our power

Let's start with a killer fit
Let's get filler in those lips

Wax that gooch and pull that strip

A-snip, snip, snip
Ooh, all of Hell's gonna want you
In this game, no one outdoes us
No one can outbuzz us

All you gotta do is trust us
Just us
Trust us

Take all these starring roles

We trademarked all your holes

There's no such thing as being totally over-exposed

Except now they're sick of you
'Cause they've seen way too much
But we'll still get the clicks from souls who hate you

Scratch that, they changed the channel
And we can't sell the scandal
Hope you had fun, but we are done with you
Your run has cancelled
We're finished, I'm not kidding
Get the fuck out of my building
Get the fuck out of my building

Snip, snip, snip, bitch
Ooh, but if you know someone new
Tell 'em that no one outdoes us
No one can out-buzz us
All they gotta do is

Come on in (come on down to Vee Tower)
Here's your key

And see how great your afterlife could be

We can live in harmony

Why be nice when you can be famous?

That's the Hazbin

Sign and cash in

Guarantee

Yeah, right, bitch
Trust me, just me
Trust

Us, no, I
I meant to say us

Uh-huh

Yeah, okay